Aimee – 10 weeks

Aimee was born a few weeks early in March 2005. She was small but had a huge personality. She touched the lives of everyone who knew her and her two older brothers were besotted with her. It was such a happy and joyous time for us.

“Sadly our joy was to be short lived. Aimee died when she was just 10 weeks old.”

Being so small Aimee needed fed quite frequently, so on the morning she died, when she hadn’t woken for 5 hours – I just knew something wasn’t right from the moment I wakened. When I looked in her cot I could tell she was dead. It seems strange, now, but at the time I felt I had to maintain our normal morning routine and get the boys up, have breakfast and get them out
to school. My eldest son had an important exam that day and he’d worked so hard for it. Looking back I’m glad I had that extra hour to myself with Aimee because I never got to hold her again.

Once the Police came, the nightmare continued. I knew they had to investigate Aimee’s death, but I felt like a criminal and it still haunts me that they carried my beautiful baby out of my home in a holdall. I was told I would get the chance to hold her again, but this never happened. All I got was hand and foot prints – which I cherish, but it was no substitute for holding my baby one last time.

I don’t know how I got through the days that followed, but eventually I was put in touch with the Scottish Cot Death Trust for support. They sent their Bereavement Support Worker to visit me and I asked to be put in touch with other parents who had been through this nightmare. Unfortunately the Trust didn’t have anyone available at the time, but they have since developed a
network of befrienders. In fact, I have trained as a befriender myself and I now help other parents going through the same nightmare. I also attend other support days at the Scottish Cot Death Trust and find it very helpful and comforting to meet other parents.

Life is still very difficult but I believe that Aimee was sent to change my life and I’m determined to help others as best I can.